The first meeting always reserves surprises, unknown oblige. Whether this meeting takes place following a virtual exchange on a dating site or after making contact in the evening, for example, it is your first one-on-one. With her, with him, with the person who you like. So for the surprise to be good, and in order to put the odds on your side by making a good impression, it is fashionable not to talk about everything and anything straight away. Indeed, on the first date, there are topics of conversation that it is better not to broach.Why? Because you don’t know each other yet, some subjects can be intrusive, you have to go slowly in discovering the other. Here are the main topics of conversation to avoid on a first date.
The main topics of conversation to avoid for a first date:
1 / Depressing banalities are to be avoided for a first date!
” I don’t know about you, but I had a bad day, I’m fed up with this job “, “What are the caps”, “This coffee is bad located! Impossible to park… ”. Hello, the atmosphere with such introductions. You are there to have a good time, avoid complaining, being negative, or boring. Talk about nice things. Otherwise, you will give a bad first impression. It could seriously shorten the date.
“You’re really fed up with this rain, it’s a time to stay at home”.
Read also: 15 sentences to never say during a first meeting
Here is the worst of the worst: bitching, complaining, being clumsy and talking about the worst boring subject, the weather! It is a subject of incessant complaints and of mortal boredom, quite simply.
2 / Controversial subjects should be avoided during a first meeting
There are subjects known to be “dangerous”, even with family or friends. The main controversial subjects are politics, money, and religion.
So it’s up to you to decide according to the atmosphere between you, the openness of each person, your ideas, the news… Keep in mind that these are not innocent subjects to be launched straight away, but see depending on the progress of your meeting.
Regarding money in particular, the famous “how much do you earn ” or “does it pay off for a job? “ Can impersonate a venal person. If for you, the notion of engagement in a couple goes with professional stability, be subtle by asking what he or she does for a living, but not to mention salary.
3 / Avoid talking about your faults and bad habits during the first meeting
The idea is not to lie, we all have faults and we can even laugh about it. Ditto for petty quirks and bad habits. But making a list of its worst flaws right away sucks. Avoid phrases like “I’m jealous, I’ve already rummaged through my ex’s phone.”
If you are in a somewhat wobbly life situation, and it can happen, avoid saying too much. No shame to be unemployed or to squat with a friend, but that does not sell the dream.
After a certain age, for example, still living with your parents can make you look like someone immature or unstable. The other may think that you are running away from responsibility or commitment. So you can say: “I’m looking for an apartment” or “I’m moving” and you will explain the details later.
4 / Your “little” person should not be THE topic of conversation for the first date
The man or woman in front of you is there to get to know you, that’s a fact. However, you don’t have to tell him your whole life, unwrap your CV, or worse, your autobiography in one go.
The idea is to exchange, to nourish a dialogue, to create an interaction between you two, not to make a monologue.
5 / The hot topic: the ex! PROHIBITED!
Your number of conquests, your last serious relationship, when, how, and why it ended… It is not taboo but it is to be avoided. Your date doesn’t need or want to know that you are coming out of a conflicted or fused relationship and that you sometimes regret your separation. Can you imagine the reverse? No one wants to be a filler.
Read also: How long to wait after a first date?
In the same idea, do not have fun telling your sentimental galleys, your previous dates with balls. By speaking thus, you include him in spite of yourselves in the circle of the pathetic people met so far. You pass for a collector or a dissatisfied one, your choice.
So a golden rule: we don’t talk about our exes and we avoid comparisons “my ex wore the same perfume as you”, it’s very awkward and it is not a compliment.
6 / sex
As a man, it is simply not advisable to broach the subject or make any allusions to sex on the first date at the risk of appearing a big heavy at best, a pervert at worst. To avoid “Sex is very important in a couple” or “It is an important criterion for me from the start”.
If you are a woman, it is not safe to broach THE subject. The catch: by talking about it too early, and by being the one who dares to broach the subject, you risk sending a false message (I sleep easily) or even worse, scare him away.
In short, avoid talking about sex on the first date. The other surely does not want to reveal his privacy prematurely. In addition, you risk passing for someone who is only looking for an adventure.
Be in the seduction not to be friendzoned (e) yes, but without going too far.
7 / Complain about your celibacy
Why are you at this meeting? To meet someone you like. So avoid melodrama. The profile of the one who has never had luck in love, who has known nothing but disappointments, it’s calimero …
Show confidence in yourself, and avoid “In general, I am left every time”, “I only attract failures. “. By doing this, you are implying that the person in front of you is of little value because only a bad person can want you. It is very annoying.
But in addition, you devalue yourself. If you don’t show confidence in yourself, the person in front may look negatively at you.
If the topic comes up, instead say with humor that you haven’t met the right person yet or with a romantic outlook on the situation, explaining that you are looking for the man or woman of your life.