How to let go of someone with whom the relationship is impossible?
One-way relationship, social or family pressure, distance, adultery are all forms of an impossible love.
What is impossible love?
Unrequited love is the most common form of impossible love. One-sided, unrequited love, the person you love doesn’t feel the same way about you. As painful as it is, we have to face the facts. You love without hope of receiving love in return.
The long-distance relationship
A long- distance relationship can work if both partners see things the same way. However, it must be recognized that this situation requires a lot of patience and mutual efforts. If we do not preserve the couple by really investing, love at a distance can have negative consequences and become unlivable. As the relationship deteriorates, this love at a distance becomes impossible.
Forbidden loves are stories that cannot last or sometimes even see the light of day, because of the family, religious, social or cultural context. The most classic example is the relationship of adultery, falling in love with a married man or woman. But the weight of the ban can also come from the family, which for reasons of differences in social rank, religion, or age difference, opposes your love.
How to let go of someone with whom the relationship is impossible?
You are in one of his listed situations where you realize that you are hoping in vain. Your feelings aren’t enough to fuel the relationship, or you start to realize that you are waiting for something that will never happen. Only between realizing it and admitting it is there a lag and it often takes time to accept it. Detaching yourself from someone you love or think you love, with whom you wanted to project yourself, is not easy. How to do ? Take steps to free yourself from this trapped relationship and find yourself.
Detach from someone with whom a relationship is impossible in 8 steps
# 1 Analyze your feelings: love or attachment?
Do you actually have feelings or do you fantasize about this relationship? It is not uncommon to idealize the other in an impossible relationship. And so to confuse love and attachment, sometimes even nurturing a form of emotional dependence. How could this person be the love of your life ? Can’t someone else make you experience true love? It is not a question of repressing your feelings but on the contrary of measuring them , by trying to take as much distance as possible.
# 2 take the time to mourn this relationship
Take the time to mourn this relationship so that you can move on for good. Allow yourself to be sad, to cry. Give yourself some time to let go of that person who held a special place in your heart. There is no rule, the time for loving mourning is different for each of us . Trust in time, which remains the best medicine to soothe heartaches. Be patient, but above all, be kind to yourself . It may be difficult, there will be relapses certain hours, certain days, but time will help you to learn from this history and especially to grow. You can then let go, and continue your journey serenely.
# 3 Be honest with yourself about this relationship
Being in love can make us idealize a person or a relationship. But love is not that. You have to see the other and the relationship as a whole and above all with honesty. This is how you can admit the shortcomings of this story, what is wrong, hurts you, hurts you. Also, the person you have this impossible relationship with is far from perfect, they have flaws, and they don’t love you the way they should. Ask yourself all of these questions and answer them as honestly as possible. This will make your point of view more realistic and make you see this relationship from a different perspective.
# 4 agree to forget it
This is the most difficult step, because living in an impossible relationship creates a form of addiction , creating reactions similar to an addicted person. Giving up on it initially creates an emotional, even physical, discomfort which can be very painful. You have to accept this relationship of dependence in order to get out of it, and this is not without difficulty. To forget an impossible love, you must first accept this idea. To accept to forget is to accept that it is time to move on. Also, the most effective way to say goodbye to an impossible love will be to cut the bridges .
How to let go of someone with whom the relationship is impossible? 4 other steps
# 5 cut ties
After accepting the idea that it’s time to let go of this impossible love, you have to cut the ties in order to cut the bridges . For that, we must no longer see the object of this impossible love, no longer call it, distance ourselves and do whatever it takes to break the links. Delete messages, delete social networks, give him back his things, tidy up or throw away memories … All these gestures allow you to take the other out of your daily life, to attenuate and dilute his presence. One of the existing techniques for cutting the bonds of attachment is that of stick figures. This exercise does not destroy sincere love, but allows you to cut the toxic bonds of attachment that prevent you from moving forward.
# 6 find your own life routine
It’s time to start a new step. This impossible love has perhaps occupied the majority of your time, your days, your nights. And it has been for months and maybe even years, not to mention all the energy put into it through your invested thoughts, emotions and feelings. Letting him go is not easy, but by making a firm decision to make this change to find yourself, everything will become easier. It’s time to think about yourself, your desires, your needs, your dreams.The moment of the final farewell to this impossible relationship is an opportunity to venture into an elsewhere full of promise. So allow yourself to live fully for yourself, don’t expect to forget it by staying all day rehashing your story. If you allow yourself to let go, you will gradually move away from the feelings that were gnawing at you until then.
# 7 rediscover a social life
We can never say it enough, to forget someone and mourn a relationship, you have to think of something else and be well surrounded. For that, your social life, your friends and your family, have an important role to play. In this new stage, once your love mourning is well underway, rediscover a social life and go out, do what you love, go see friends. Confide in them and change your mind. The goal is not to indulge you in your grief, but to get out of it thanks to your loved ones. Indeed, having a present and benevolent entourage, which supports you, is essential when you go through a difficult moment because of an impossible relationship.
# 8 Be at peace with this story
Once all these steps have been taken, there is one left to definitively close this chapter of your life. You need to accept the fact that this relationship is over, but it’s been part of your story. Having regrets and feeding them needlessly won’t help you move forward. There is a lesson to be learned from everything that happens to us in life, because everything that we experience builds us. What to remember is the experience you have had. Indeed, you loved someone despite everything. You are therefore capable of love. But above all you have understood that you deserve better than impossible love. You are also and above all worthy of being loved and therefore you deserve to experience reciprocal love.